Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘someone in the family has cancer’

Last year when I attended the NCCSHG conference, I was invited to lead a workshop, and was glad to do so. Not surprisingly I talked about Life in the Cancer Fallout Zone, and on the form there were three workshop slots listed. As I didn’t mind when I gave the workshop I ticked all 3 boxes – and ended up running the workshop 3 times! Now, I didn’t mind this and thoroughly enjoyed interacting with each set of participants, but it was rather tiring!
Fast forward to 2010 and I was again asked if I would like to lead a workshop. This time, though, I knew I was only going to be there for one workshop session, so I said no. Instead I decided to do something for myself – to attend a workshop. I went to learn a little more about crystals and particularly pendulums – and it gave me a real boost before I set off on the long drive home to Dorset. The drive went well and I arrived home in good spirits. Compare that to how I might have felt had I been ‘working’ up until I left the conference.
When someone in the family has cancer, it can seem really radical to do something for yourself. But it can also do a lot of good. Sometimes it’s extra hard because it means saying no to someone or something – as I did. What I found was that although I didn’t need to I explained that I was taking care of myself – and got a really positive response.
There are so many demands in life that sometimes you end up with no time to call your own. You may even want to do all the things you are asked to do, or invited to attend. But maybe next time before you say ‘yes’ automatically you should think about what else is already happening. You may want to do each thing, but do you really want to do all of them? And if saying yes really means saying no to doing something for yourself then maybe a gentle ‘I’d love to, but I’m afraid I can’t’ would enable you to be more supportive in the long run.
PS It won’t make you a selfish person!

Advertisements

Read Full Post »